1. Wedding for Married Couples
(Wet Dream)
Location of a party, and afterward I run through the town streets on my own in a hurry, because there is just a lot to do. Light, and these are the back streets, though it may be night, streets mostly deserted, but not all the time, reminds me of Oudstrijdersstraat. I think some young kids follow me sometimes.
Now I am a guest in Herent somewhere, N is there, and there is a wedding and I am invited.
Ludr is there, she is a neighbour of parents. I come to this place because I am invited, but feel a stranger among the many people about, even if I know them, because some were neighbours once, and my own family is here, parents and brothers. Where I enter is behind the facade of a large building, like that of a school, then where I am now is like a playground, there is to the right (in the dream the front) a terrace with people waiting. To my left there are steps down to another playground with the shade of trees, and this is the actual entrance to the party and I am near it. N is still at the first level, but he can move freely and has been here long. I am not late, but many people are already here.
I do what I think I should which is entering, but before I am halted by Ludr, who stands near me and was approaching the gate, because there is a queue to go inside to the nether playground. And she addresses me asking me casually if my situation has changed: are you married? She means if I have married since last time I saw her, which would be possible, since it has been a very long time that I saw her, but no I am here alone, and she knows well enough that I am single. She explains or implies that only married people can go in. I'm confused. I am actually angry, upset with her. And I go on anyway, because I have a right. Hafr is also here.
I continue and mix with the people, I have to look out for my brother N, because he is chasing me, and I don't want that. Maybe the early part of the dream was much like that, and it only continues here. I run away from him.
Among other things I have to do the press (?), and there are four tasks I have to fulfill and I have to fulfill them everytime. That is what I am so busy with.
This party may be the wedding of Stco, who was also a neighbour once.
My mother is there, and she is angry at me, and I walk away from her. Can't remember well why she is angry. Because I run away I come in the hall where the children are left behind while the grown-ups do this party. This is to the right (front) of the second playground. Still light and sunny.
All the children look up, surprised, and remain distant. They even look scared, when they see me.
I know I can't stay here, so I go back and away, back up to the first playground, and try to remember my way how I came here, and I make a real effort to visualize the town and the streets, things are blue and vague as if I imagine things, but in the meanwhile I am outside, and I make a real effort to go along the streets up and to the left, but it takes me so much effort that I have to crawl, not really over ground, but rather hovering. I really want to get away, and do my best to follow a path I know leads somewhere.
At some point the dream becomes normal again, and I find a place to enter in a back alley, or a larger street, but the place is small, and cramped when I look in it, because people are there waiting. And it looks like a wellness centre, but I know the place.
I enter this place, because I see naked ladies, but I am not allowed, surely because this place has separate quarters for men and women. They are all waiting to be treated. I squirm my way in anyway, and because I don't want to entice the anger of those girls and women, I try to leave the place as soon as I can. I see a door to the left. All is white, they are browned, they have white towels, you enter this small cabin immediately through the front door, but I see to the left another door that leads inside and it stands a little ajar, and this is my only way to get away from the ladies and be polite, so I go there.
Now I enter the room where the men are treated. Nothing but naked men. This place is much bigger, and something is funny. Two people oversee this, and they are at the other wall, behind a counter, a man and a woman, she is the only woman here. I think I see a door far away in the left opposite corner which might be the regular entry for this room. All the men have towels too, but some are stark naked. All are treated, and there is a lot of water, like this is one big complex shower. Some are halfway in a bath, one sits in a shower like he is drunk. There is something slightly off here, and I suspect the woman who is in charge is the cause, as if to keep the men under her thumb. And so on. All of them seem to have lost will. This is not a good place for me to stay. The water is clear and flows abundantly, that is the only thing I like. But I continue to the right, behind where the ladies room was, to see if I can go on. They look very vulnerable.
When I continue to see what is behind, I see only more men and shake my head, I have to go back. Again effort, and this is a rather lucid decision that I make. And I look for the room with the ladies again, venture forth, find them, and cannot go further than the first girl I see, naked, back to me, towel around her waist. Yet I stand behind her and take her from behind and feel it coming but I can't hold it back, and let it got. This is a wet dream.
2. Future Article
Fragment in which I see or find the new edition of the Viking magazine that I write for, with the blue cover. Possibly in my home. Since this is the new one and I have not written an article yet, I am curious whether there would be an article by me in it. I want to look at it.
3. Loyalty Card
First part of the dream lost to me.
Then in the shop. Busy. Light. I know I have a sweater or fleece lying about, and the weather is cold, so I go and wear it. It lies behind me, but it is a different one than I remember, but I put it on, this one is a bit stiff and too warm in fact. It reminds me of my winter coat, but more lean. Yet then I also open a window, the shop does not have such a one in reality, but it is the same window as I have in my apartment. When I do that, this is on my right, I see also that one of the doors is open and I think that is a good idea. The door must have been open the whole time, this is the right door. And that might have been why I was cold, but the window I open for fresh air.
I'm back at the till, a few customers are there but I don't feel the pressure. A young woman first and I help her. An older woman after her, but she smiles, and I think I know her as a customer who is friendly and understands patience. Someone else behind them. The young woman hands me a book she wants to buy, she wants an invoice and the book made as a present, no problem. She goes to where she can pay with the card. Then she says something, about how it must be wrapped, or what must be entered as an accompanying phrase on the invoice or in the computer at least to register the present, somehow. The other customer is listening. I can't remember exactly, but she says something about God. And I am thinking, this I can't do, she must mean 'gods', but I realize that most people around will only be familiar with the one God, so I think hard. At first I shake my head and discuss things in a friendly way and joking about it, while I try typing things in the box on my screen where it should go, and then I find a better expression, and I ask her what she thinks about it: God offers this present. Something like that. Formulated like that it is less distant than what she said. And she agrees, but changes it again, but I can't remember. And I tell her in passing, that I'm sure God would not eat meat. Maybe the book is a cookbook, with meat recipes, I'm not sure, maybe it was just the way she expressed herself at first that associated god with eating meat in my mind, which cannot be correct. I change it again and it becomes a long phrase when I enter it. The other lady nods all the while, she understands and thinks I'm doing a good job, but I can't rightaway tell them that I can't associate with their concept of God anymore.
When they are gone, another customer comes. Before that, or in between then, I was working on my own, at the till, and had spread all the necessary papers in front of me on the counter, I can't remember what it all was, but I have to make some room when the customer comes, he has a pile of books. And has a wife with him. And then there is also Liha who comes up from the basement and brings me a book, though it is not clear what I should do with it. But I take it and try to check it out via the till, but it does not work, then I understand. This is something only I can solve. The book misses the cover, or is bound wrongly from back to cover. The title is very clear: Kettricken. The whole book is about her. I take a look, interested and intruigued, but wonder what can be in it that won't be in the other books. When I try to scan it, it does not work, the price is wrong. When I type in the ean code, it does not work, it says on the computer the book is sold out, like this: U U. And the ean code is also split in sections of numbers, too old to be still updated. So I will have to use another method and will look for it. That is when the customer comes, and I put the book and thought aside. And take their books.
I ask him whether he wants a loyalty card. And he says yes, and I understand he is from Holland. Tall man, slightly bearded, brown hair. I had scanned the card, and then the books, but before he pays, lots of things are on the counter, among which his own leather purse (etui), he hands me another card, and I scan it but then I realize something and recognize this is a 10 percent card, I can't give him that. And I try to void the transaction, but then the computer does something weird, as if the programs are updated and I am not informed yet, a new window pops up and suggests what I can do with the transaction and the discount given, and I try to follow its directions, but it complicates things, and I have to void the whole thing anyway. I tell the man sorry, and take the books out of the plastic bag again and tell him I have to scan things again, he is okay. I do it, but the computer remembered the discount given and things go wrong again. This all takes a lot of time and now the customer is a bit unnerved. I stay very calm and tell him I will have to do it a third time. Now I will do it my way, properly and clean.
In the meanwhile, another colleague comes when I was busy with the books and doing something with them, so it appeared that the till was free and this colleague comes and stands at my till and I tell her to go to the other one, because I'd like to finish things here, though it could as well have been at the other till. But she listens and moves. She brought a customer with me, which tells me she had just helped this customer and now will settle the bill with her. The funny thing is that I don't know this colleague, and I realize this in the dream. She is middle age, woman, a little shorter than me, blond hair, short, smiling, friendly, easy with the computer. She reminds me of different people.
When I check the books of the Dutch customer a third time that is when the dream ends.
Monday, 14 October 2013
Sunday, 13 October 2013
Blooming Hawthorn
1. Alphabets in Herent
Simple dream with seemingly no images, so all was dark and I had thoughts about an alphabet, not just one, but many, but the many were public, and other people were doing things with these alphabets, though I did not see these people, nor knew who they were, but somehow they were present in the same mindscape as me. All the while, I wanted to protect this one alphabet, which I regarded as special, and I did not want to have anyone else know about it because that would defile it.
Later in the dream, things shifted to the desire to write, or this was all about a writing project, and this was in Herent. My home town was firmly in my mind as a location.
Only later did the dream take normal colourings, and I was in Herent, at the Wilselsesteenweg, near Den Elst, in one of the gardens of the houses there, light, sunny, outside, by day, some people outside, many of which I know, and Mael was there, though sometimes I could not decide and he was Joja2. I can't remember it all, but at some point he says he wants to go to Croatia, in fact he must, this is an escape, he feels he can't stay here. He will be away for work there and this for nine months. I don't know what to say, he is much to himself, and I don't know if he wants help, maybe I needed him or wanted him to do something for me first. This is towards the end of the dream.
2. Sol
Maybe the same dream, the first part. Something about the word Sol and the name Stefan. Can't remember what.
3. Private Party
I am invited to Pi's house, and I go there, on my way I meet someone else who is also going there but I don't know him, but it is nice to go with him. It is a sunny day, clear, atmosphere same as in dream 1. I meet him along the road and we follow the street. No houses, but I know the road, though this is a place I rarely come.
I can't remember the transition, but at some point not much later Pi is there too, by accident, and he of course guides us the whole way, we turn right, but then we turn this way and that, all the way following him, he goes quick, because he knows his way well, and when we arrive at his house, I am sure I would not have found it on my own. But I am also glad that I arrive there with him, and the house is a cottage, rather big, one floor, front garden, and a meandering path from the right to the front door in the middle of the house. The door is open and clearly things are at the ready to receive many guests.
Pi guides the way, and the other man follows right behind him and I after them. They follow the path exactly, and I marvel at the blooming Hawthorn on the side. The tuck in their heads when they go underneath its branches. I think its white blossoms are beautiful and wonder when was the last time I saw something as beautiful as this.
I was going under it, the tree to the right, other trees in line, but then I decide to go to the left, and avoid having to bend or bow, so I pass the tree.
We come to the front of the house. Already a table is set outside with food on it, and Pi seems to be in a good mood, jovial. I feel awkward going into his house, but I am invited and here now, so I go.
Already outside there were guests, but when I go inside, the hallway, and then the room to the right, in the living room I see many people, all of the guests, enjoying themselves, and I don't know anybody of them, and I am a bit uncomfortable, and think that maybe I should not have come, but this is only my unease.
There is lots of food, I look forward eating. Maybe Jeve is there, she would be the only familiar person. And the lady of the house, but I don't know her, they have a back garden, the hallway is small, and the kitchens too, behind are the private quarters.
I turn back to go back outside, only to find more strangers, that is where the dream ends.
4. Taiji Stance
Inside, I'm in front of a man and I explain something taiji to him and take his hands, the fingertips of it, when I stand in front of him, and ask him to push me. His hands were on shoulder height.
Simple dream with seemingly no images, so all was dark and I had thoughts about an alphabet, not just one, but many, but the many were public, and other people were doing things with these alphabets, though I did not see these people, nor knew who they were, but somehow they were present in the same mindscape as me. All the while, I wanted to protect this one alphabet, which I regarded as special, and I did not want to have anyone else know about it because that would defile it.
Later in the dream, things shifted to the desire to write, or this was all about a writing project, and this was in Herent. My home town was firmly in my mind as a location.
Only later did the dream take normal colourings, and I was in Herent, at the Wilselsesteenweg, near Den Elst, in one of the gardens of the houses there, light, sunny, outside, by day, some people outside, many of which I know, and Mael was there, though sometimes I could not decide and he was Joja2. I can't remember it all, but at some point he says he wants to go to Croatia, in fact he must, this is an escape, he feels he can't stay here. He will be away for work there and this for nine months. I don't know what to say, he is much to himself, and I don't know if he wants help, maybe I needed him or wanted him to do something for me first. This is towards the end of the dream.
2. Sol
Maybe the same dream, the first part. Something about the word Sol and the name Stefan. Can't remember what.
3. Private Party
I am invited to Pi's house, and I go there, on my way I meet someone else who is also going there but I don't know him, but it is nice to go with him. It is a sunny day, clear, atmosphere same as in dream 1. I meet him along the road and we follow the street. No houses, but I know the road, though this is a place I rarely come.
I can't remember the transition, but at some point not much later Pi is there too, by accident, and he of course guides us the whole way, we turn right, but then we turn this way and that, all the way following him, he goes quick, because he knows his way well, and when we arrive at his house, I am sure I would not have found it on my own. But I am also glad that I arrive there with him, and the house is a cottage, rather big, one floor, front garden, and a meandering path from the right to the front door in the middle of the house. The door is open and clearly things are at the ready to receive many guests.
Pi guides the way, and the other man follows right behind him and I after them. They follow the path exactly, and I marvel at the blooming Hawthorn on the side. The tuck in their heads when they go underneath its branches. I think its white blossoms are beautiful and wonder when was the last time I saw something as beautiful as this.
I was going under it, the tree to the right, other trees in line, but then I decide to go to the left, and avoid having to bend or bow, so I pass the tree.
We come to the front of the house. Already a table is set outside with food on it, and Pi seems to be in a good mood, jovial. I feel awkward going into his house, but I am invited and here now, so I go.
Already outside there were guests, but when I go inside, the hallway, and then the room to the right, in the living room I see many people, all of the guests, enjoying themselves, and I don't know anybody of them, and I am a bit uncomfortable, and think that maybe I should not have come, but this is only my unease.
There is lots of food, I look forward eating. Maybe Jeve is there, she would be the only familiar person. And the lady of the house, but I don't know her, they have a back garden, the hallway is small, and the kitchens too, behind are the private quarters.
I turn back to go back outside, only to find more strangers, that is where the dream ends.
4. Taiji Stance
Inside, I'm in front of a man and I explain something taiji to him and take his hands, the fingertips of it, when I stand in front of him, and ask him to push me. His hands were on shoulder height.
Saturday, 12 October 2013
Dark Water Rug
1. Erection
At some point in the dream I have an erection, and while other people are around there is one person destined for me, but this is all set up and part of a bigger thing, I don't really choose things myself. But when I start to become awake in the dream I find myself in this situation, and from that moment I try to force myself a little, while the people attending me, all women I suppose, are gentle and know what must happen. All is vague, inside, dark, stairs maybe, living room maybe. When I decide I can do things for myself (because I become a little more lucid), the erection starts to fade.
Then the dream changes, as if I have fallen back asleep or into the dream, and now I am in the car, and things are light, we drive outside, up and down the countryside, like in an animation film, and I am on the right back seat. Two people in front. I don't know any of them, but in the dream they are familiar, so were things earlier. Again, possibly all women. But I'm still working with this erection, this was a major theme in the dream. And now I get it right, but now I am also on my own, while I want people to see it. And my cock is bigger than it really is, and I put a condom about it, and it makes it look even bigger, and I start to masturbate, but then I become more aware of the person on my left, who would also be a lady, and I am thinking this is not what I want, I want to save this for when things really happen, not when I'm alone, and I stop. The dream would otherwise have been a wet one.
That woman on my left looked rather irritated.
While we're in the car, the dream focuses most on the landscape on the right, and that is where I look and I see houses, but all seems like in a cartoon, the trees and hills, the colour green of it.
Later in the dream, I have an erection again, and there's something about food, and something something, and I draw up the plan for it, on a piece of paper, in black. As if I something something, and two ladies agree. But I can't remember what this is about.
2. Dark Lake in Building
I suppose this can be the continuation of dream 1. I mean the same dream.
There is a house, late, and some sort of camp, I don't really know what my place in this is, but I follow. Rooms in a corridor, all small rooms, wood, dark. At some point we come to the centre of the building around which the corridors are build, and everyone of the people present here converges there, but there is fear as well. I am neutral.
People are in a hurry. I am in such a lazy mood and not connected with what they are about that I am late, I hurry in the end. There is some sort of crisis going on.
The centre of the building holds a lake, this has dark water, and something is amiss with that, and people are afraid of it. But I am not, and I know I can even walk on that water, and I do, and others do too, and explore, but every time they do it with meaning, as if they can solve something, or banish the darkness. And I go to the end of where I can go, for there is a certain film on the lake, rather thick, that makes it easy to stand upon, but at some point the water is normal, though still dark, and I would not want to touch that.
I go over this water myself a few times, not all dare too, but at none of these times it makes any difference. Yet, the last time I do and walk to the end of the film, so to speak, things look more like grass, but they are still fluid, water. The film actually looks like a rug. This last time I realize I can lift it, because I know where it ends, and I've walked it several times, so I kneel at the edge, and put my hands underneath the dark rug and pull it, lift it from the water, and it works. When people see me do this they join, and in a joined effort we remove the rug which is very big off from the lake and put it aside, which is on the right side, which I did on purpose, because the left side is where we used to run hurriedly, and I see that the water becomes healthy again, that is, I see vegetation reappearing and it becomes a little lighter, though not very much, but it is a start. The water becomes more normal.
Now I have to take care that people walking in the other corridor won't step on the rug. We've rolled it more or less and pushed it to the side, but it takes a lot of space, so you have to be careful. And this is in fact the corridor that leads out, so everyone will have to take this route sooner or later, because everyone was leaving anyway. The rug is still dangerous, if you would touch it you would get infected again, or die or disappear, in fact I don't know what will happen, but I assume the people in the dream will know.
Also, at the same time, there is a queue forming, people are waiting, probably because the rug on the water is in the way of progress, they are all anxious, full of sympathy, caring. That is when we pull the rug to the side.
This corridor is where the rooms are. And now there is problem, so maybe the problem has only changed place, shifted. An interesting effect now in this corridor is that when people leave, there is always one door that cannot open, but it changes every time another person leaves, as if taking turns. Guests seem to understand this quickly, and they come out one by one, alternating, and everyone is moving out. That is the end of the dream.
At some point in the dream I have an erection, and while other people are around there is one person destined for me, but this is all set up and part of a bigger thing, I don't really choose things myself. But when I start to become awake in the dream I find myself in this situation, and from that moment I try to force myself a little, while the people attending me, all women I suppose, are gentle and know what must happen. All is vague, inside, dark, stairs maybe, living room maybe. When I decide I can do things for myself (because I become a little more lucid), the erection starts to fade.
Then the dream changes, as if I have fallen back asleep or into the dream, and now I am in the car, and things are light, we drive outside, up and down the countryside, like in an animation film, and I am on the right back seat. Two people in front. I don't know any of them, but in the dream they are familiar, so were things earlier. Again, possibly all women. But I'm still working with this erection, this was a major theme in the dream. And now I get it right, but now I am also on my own, while I want people to see it. And my cock is bigger than it really is, and I put a condom about it, and it makes it look even bigger, and I start to masturbate, but then I become more aware of the person on my left, who would also be a lady, and I am thinking this is not what I want, I want to save this for when things really happen, not when I'm alone, and I stop. The dream would otherwise have been a wet one.
That woman on my left looked rather irritated.
While we're in the car, the dream focuses most on the landscape on the right, and that is where I look and I see houses, but all seems like in a cartoon, the trees and hills, the colour green of it.
Later in the dream, I have an erection again, and there's something about food, and something something, and I draw up the plan for it, on a piece of paper, in black. As if I something something, and two ladies agree. But I can't remember what this is about.
2. Dark Lake in Building
I suppose this can be the continuation of dream 1. I mean the same dream.
There is a house, late, and some sort of camp, I don't really know what my place in this is, but I follow. Rooms in a corridor, all small rooms, wood, dark. At some point we come to the centre of the building around which the corridors are build, and everyone of the people present here converges there, but there is fear as well. I am neutral.
People are in a hurry. I am in such a lazy mood and not connected with what they are about that I am late, I hurry in the end. There is some sort of crisis going on.
The centre of the building holds a lake, this has dark water, and something is amiss with that, and people are afraid of it. But I am not, and I know I can even walk on that water, and I do, and others do too, and explore, but every time they do it with meaning, as if they can solve something, or banish the darkness. And I go to the end of where I can go, for there is a certain film on the lake, rather thick, that makes it easy to stand upon, but at some point the water is normal, though still dark, and I would not want to touch that.
I go over this water myself a few times, not all dare too, but at none of these times it makes any difference. Yet, the last time I do and walk to the end of the film, so to speak, things look more like grass, but they are still fluid, water. The film actually looks like a rug. This last time I realize I can lift it, because I know where it ends, and I've walked it several times, so I kneel at the edge, and put my hands underneath the dark rug and pull it, lift it from the water, and it works. When people see me do this they join, and in a joined effort we remove the rug which is very big off from the lake and put it aside, which is on the right side, which I did on purpose, because the left side is where we used to run hurriedly, and I see that the water becomes healthy again, that is, I see vegetation reappearing and it becomes a little lighter, though not very much, but it is a start. The water becomes more normal.
Now I have to take care that people walking in the other corridor won't step on the rug. We've rolled it more or less and pushed it to the side, but it takes a lot of space, so you have to be careful. And this is in fact the corridor that leads out, so everyone will have to take this route sooner or later, because everyone was leaving anyway. The rug is still dangerous, if you would touch it you would get infected again, or die or disappear, in fact I don't know what will happen, but I assume the people in the dream will know.
Also, at the same time, there is a queue forming, people are waiting, probably because the rug on the water is in the way of progress, they are all anxious, full of sympathy, caring. That is when we pull the rug to the side.
This corridor is where the rooms are. And now there is problem, so maybe the problem has only changed place, shifted. An interesting effect now in this corridor is that when people leave, there is always one door that cannot open, but it changes every time another person leaves, as if taking turns. Guests seem to understand this quickly, and they come out one by one, alternating, and everyone is moving out. That is the end of the dream.
Friday, 11 October 2013
Half an Hour of Freedom
1. Hall
Something about a big hall, maybe a school, in a corner of the building. Can't remember well. Something about a wheel? Warm, dark, reds, rusty.
2. Twice Half an Hour of Free Time
Everyone is already home (of family presumably), but there have also arrived other people, unknown by me. In fact, I arrive home in an unfamiliar surroundings (though on second thought it reminds me of Chwe's place). Mother is there, but certainly other family members too.
Place is on a second floor, greys, whites, soft, all rooms on one floor (looks like Chwe's place, but maybe mirrored or something, which is why I don't recognize it in the dream).
I have not eaten enough, but also have to work on a pc still, or at work. When I came late from wherever I had already gained time of about half another. This kind of thing otherwise never happens to me. And now when I get home, I have again time on my hands, a period of half an hour that I am completely free. After a short while I start to think that maybe there is surely something I should or now could be doing, but I can't remember it. That something like this happens twice on a day is really exceptional.
I'm then in the kitchen, where also my mother is. D and maybe the others are in the living room, which is to the right. The kitchen has a table, window to the left, but the actual kitchen is through a door, into a cramped space (this most of all reminds me of Chwe's place). And mother suggests that I help, but I myself thought this as well, that I might as well do the dishes, I have a glass bowl with me, which is medium size, but when I go to the kitchen I see a very large bowl already waiting in the sink. I put mine on top. I assume this is my brother's, D. And I am thinking I should wash them both, but I am not in the mood to do the dishes, so I walk away. There is no one else in the kitchen, no room anyway, but no one else cares at all. This is when my attention is more turned to my brother D, who is in the living room to the right, in a sofa.
But I want to sit down somewhere with my pc and work. This is real work, and I have to do it.
3. Wedding Car
In a shop. This is in an unfamiliar, town, quite, like on a Sunday. Cobbled streets. There is this shop to our right, I know it and want to briefly go in. You have to take a step up if you want to, the shop is small, and the door opens a height from street level, so I actually climb the window of the shop, to the left of the door, so I can stand there and leave others plenty of space to stand in the door and crowd inside. It happens that other customers are in the shop. It is quite merry.
When I intend to go in then Inla2, partner of my brother, also wants to go and she actually reaches the thing first, N follows, I follow. They are inside quick enough, I for some reason like to stay outside on the sill more or less. When I go inside, I hear N and Inla2 take care of things, they are happy to have found this shop to work on their house. Inla2 says something like: next time I enroll I will do for the course "true love" and not "regulate". This are courses given out by the city they live in, in this case the place where they still live, they organize this, and Inla2 took this smaller course because she thought she would learn all the basics and would not need the bigger course. But now she changed her mind, but I can't remember why, in the dream it was clear. It has to do with regulation regarding building.
Then we leave, with the car, I suppose we came by car as well, first I was alone, then my brother and his partner were there along. And when we leave now, even more people are in the car.
The car itself is not ours, but Inla2 claims it. So we actually steal it. They need the car, and I think, okay, so long as they bring it back in time, but they make a detour, and I am thinking that is not responsible, but Inla2 wants to go to the bank first, which she knows is here in the neighbourhood. First we go straight through, then to the right and then continue to the left, straight through. The bank is on the left. Inla2 is driving and N is in the other seat. I am in the back, as are other people. The car is also small, but is open too, on top, no roof. And we sit high, yet it does not look old. Maybe old-fashioned.
I think it is rude that they use this car for their own ends. If they had driven straight to where we need to go, then I would not have minded.
After that we continue, we are still in the car, come into a country side, but more like a lane, wide and long, and open, and sandy, very straight. And by the end I see a T-crossing, but before we are there, Inla2 gets out. She jumps out and leaves the driver's seat unoccupied, the car still runs. N is still in the car, but I from the back seat takes the control, somehow having faith that N will do his part, and after I reach out, he reaches out as well. And one of us does the wheel, and the other does the pedals. And we drive safe, but slow, and eventually come to a stop, it is not much longer to the T-crossing, other people are waiting there, all very chique, dressed up as if for a marriage. Lot of them dressed in white, all of them like brides.
At the crossing, I see cars come from the left. I wonder whether they need to be here as well, for the same party, wedding, but I think not. Yet they almost drive us off of the road, which is not very nice, but I could we should have been careful, which is what I was. But they don't pass, but stay. I'm not sure what it means.
I get out of the car, everyone else too. The people waiting are still waiting, so are we, but at least we are here. This will be a wedding. Nice place for it.
Jeve is there, and she as some kind of master of ceremony. The whole thing now seems like a standing reception, with drinks, joy, anticipation, we are all waiting for the last car to appear, from where we came. Lucid this last part.
Something about a big hall, maybe a school, in a corner of the building. Can't remember well. Something about a wheel? Warm, dark, reds, rusty.
2. Twice Half an Hour of Free Time
Everyone is already home (of family presumably), but there have also arrived other people, unknown by me. In fact, I arrive home in an unfamiliar surroundings (though on second thought it reminds me of Chwe's place). Mother is there, but certainly other family members too.
Place is on a second floor, greys, whites, soft, all rooms on one floor (looks like Chwe's place, but maybe mirrored or something, which is why I don't recognize it in the dream).
I have not eaten enough, but also have to work on a pc still, or at work. When I came late from wherever I had already gained time of about half another. This kind of thing otherwise never happens to me. And now when I get home, I have again time on my hands, a period of half an hour that I am completely free. After a short while I start to think that maybe there is surely something I should or now could be doing, but I can't remember it. That something like this happens twice on a day is really exceptional.
I'm then in the kitchen, where also my mother is. D and maybe the others are in the living room, which is to the right. The kitchen has a table, window to the left, but the actual kitchen is through a door, into a cramped space (this most of all reminds me of Chwe's place). And mother suggests that I help, but I myself thought this as well, that I might as well do the dishes, I have a glass bowl with me, which is medium size, but when I go to the kitchen I see a very large bowl already waiting in the sink. I put mine on top. I assume this is my brother's, D. And I am thinking I should wash them both, but I am not in the mood to do the dishes, so I walk away. There is no one else in the kitchen, no room anyway, but no one else cares at all. This is when my attention is more turned to my brother D, who is in the living room to the right, in a sofa.
But I want to sit down somewhere with my pc and work. This is real work, and I have to do it.
3. Wedding Car
In a shop. This is in an unfamiliar, town, quite, like on a Sunday. Cobbled streets. There is this shop to our right, I know it and want to briefly go in. You have to take a step up if you want to, the shop is small, and the door opens a height from street level, so I actually climb the window of the shop, to the left of the door, so I can stand there and leave others plenty of space to stand in the door and crowd inside. It happens that other customers are in the shop. It is quite merry.
When I intend to go in then Inla2, partner of my brother, also wants to go and she actually reaches the thing first, N follows, I follow. They are inside quick enough, I for some reason like to stay outside on the sill more or less. When I go inside, I hear N and Inla2 take care of things, they are happy to have found this shop to work on their house. Inla2 says something like: next time I enroll I will do for the course "true love" and not "regulate". This are courses given out by the city they live in, in this case the place where they still live, they organize this, and Inla2 took this smaller course because she thought she would learn all the basics and would not need the bigger course. But now she changed her mind, but I can't remember why, in the dream it was clear. It has to do with regulation regarding building.
Then we leave, with the car, I suppose we came by car as well, first I was alone, then my brother and his partner were there along. And when we leave now, even more people are in the car.
The car itself is not ours, but Inla2 claims it. So we actually steal it. They need the car, and I think, okay, so long as they bring it back in time, but they make a detour, and I am thinking that is not responsible, but Inla2 wants to go to the bank first, which she knows is here in the neighbourhood. First we go straight through, then to the right and then continue to the left, straight through. The bank is on the left. Inla2 is driving and N is in the other seat. I am in the back, as are other people. The car is also small, but is open too, on top, no roof. And we sit high, yet it does not look old. Maybe old-fashioned.
I think it is rude that they use this car for their own ends. If they had driven straight to where we need to go, then I would not have minded.
After that we continue, we are still in the car, come into a country side, but more like a lane, wide and long, and open, and sandy, very straight. And by the end I see a T-crossing, but before we are there, Inla2 gets out. She jumps out and leaves the driver's seat unoccupied, the car still runs. N is still in the car, but I from the back seat takes the control, somehow having faith that N will do his part, and after I reach out, he reaches out as well. And one of us does the wheel, and the other does the pedals. And we drive safe, but slow, and eventually come to a stop, it is not much longer to the T-crossing, other people are waiting there, all very chique, dressed up as if for a marriage. Lot of them dressed in white, all of them like brides.
At the crossing, I see cars come from the left. I wonder whether they need to be here as well, for the same party, wedding, but I think not. Yet they almost drive us off of the road, which is not very nice, but I could we should have been careful, which is what I was. But they don't pass, but stay. I'm not sure what it means.
I get out of the car, everyone else too. The people waiting are still waiting, so are we, but at least we are here. This will be a wedding. Nice place for it.
Jeve is there, and she as some kind of master of ceremony. The whole thing now seems like a standing reception, with drinks, joy, anticipation, we are all waiting for the last car to appear, from where we came. Lucid this last part.
Thursday, 10 October 2013
Three Books
1. Lettuce with Goat Cheese
Market, half inside, such as Borough Market in London, but one long stretch. I am part of the crew, yet not of any stall in particular, and am on the customer side. I see a transaction between a woman seller and a young man coming to buy something. The woman recommends her wares, in this case fresh lettuce with goat's cheese on top, and I think it looks really good and fresh, and am already thinking I should have this myself when I wake up. He is not easily persuaded, but she serves nothing else to him, so he accepts eventually, smiling all the way. They are both very kind to each other and the transaction is amiable, I like that. He makes some comment as to the truth of her words when she packs the lettuce with goat cheese on it here and there.
There were also all kinds of carrots, and the woman intended to prepare them for a salad, I am now at her side and am of a mind to help her. My own thoughts go to adding radishes, but she does not have them, though thinking about them creates them. She has a purple kind of carrot in particular which she wants to add, and I am curious because I know it is delicious, and at the same time I don't know the root, and want to see her prepare it, but I never see it. Other ingredients were there, all on the wooden tables where her wares are.
2. Skunk Anansi
In the shop, Tama is working and I join her, at the till, there is a long queue, and we are the only two present in the shop, so it comes down to us. At first I was not at the till but in the back, now I walk to the counter, and pass through all the folk crowded, and the shop is long and small, and people are packed. And I think one or two people came to get me out and walk me to the till, so I go with them, but when I see on my right halfway through the shop Skunk Anansi playing I stop a little and wave. I knew she would be playing, but still the sight of her surprised be, and I thought it good that she entertained people, this is a success, to have someone like that in the shop. But for now I have to go to the till and help out Tama.
There are only three titles and soon enough all the copies are gone, though they were here in great quantities, but the books are popular and everyone wants one.
At some point I am having trouble with the change in the till, because we ran out of notes of five and maybe other things, and after a while I announce to Tama that I should go and fetch some change from the float. I know she will find it difficult, and I have to leave her alone for a while, since there is no one else, but I have to do this, so I go, and in the back, which looks like the Oxfam shop where I worked once, from the safe I take some change, and I even say the word 'float' when someone asks from behind the purple curtain that separates this dark chamber from the shop, but this is someone I can trust, I know her.
3. The Giant
Other fragment. Again a long space, dark now. I am on the left. We all sit. I am not all the way on the left, and other people are with me, but my brother D is on the right, which is another group. And I have work to do with DVD's, and the people with me join me. And there is one dvd, which is called The Giant, with a black cover, that I know is a bit special, but after I've handled it I put it aside, which is all the way to the left, as if abandoned, and this I do without leaving my chair somehow.
But D knows about this dvd, and warns me, and at that point already I had seen the black stuff coming from the corner where I put the dvd. The stuff reminded me of the Shrike, a character from an sf novel, so the stuff is some technology and something alive as well, it is like an arm, maybe a sort of metal, I can't describe it well, maybe if you make a long stick from lego bricks that would come near it. But there are many such arms, tendrils, but not flexible, but strong, like robotic, and composite all of them, and black, and one of these is longer than the others and comes toward me and I fear it, but it never reaches me exactly, but D warns me and says I should be careful, and I know I should go away, but I don't want to, but the thing never touches me. There must have been some intelligence or will in it.
4. Celery and Ruby
Open space inside, selling going on, haggling also. This is like a fair, and again I am part of the crew, but not an active one, not selling myself, but helping out and I know about the goods. The first thing sold I can't remember, but there was another family waiting at the same time, who had already chosen what they wanted to buy, and I see it lying on the floor. They want celery, but it is as large and big as branches from a big tree, longer than a man, really gigantic. They can't carry it because it is so big, which is why it is on the floor.
Finally the seller has time to attend to them, and he goes into detail, and they are happy, especially the wife. And he goes so far as to say he can tell the future or fortune by these celery sticks. And he counts the years by tens that she will have to live, but I see that the count will not work out when I follow his tallying, and it is so, because at the end he starts to say seventy, eighty, ninety, and the last part of this celery is more like leek in fact, but I see how he counts it, no secret for me. And I also realize that when he would have counted right, he would end by an age of seventy. But now he himself is confused. He does not care and continues and says he can see how many children they will have, namely four, because of the knots where the celery forks, and I nod when I see it. But if I remember well, they had two kids already, yet they are happy with the prospect.
Then or maybe before, the seller asks my help again with other customers, again a family, the wife comes to collect something she ordered, has questions, out of curiosity, and the seller helps her well, and orders me around for this or that, but I know what it is about so it is okay.
I am wearing my ruby on a string here, and this family is the family Robijns, which means ruby, and the woman comes for a ruby, she has one herself, which had to be repaired or something, but the seller shows him other goods, and she is choosing. The seller says about the ruby she is wearing that she should have it cut. I see all those stones, there are others beside ruby. She bends over it to have a good look. We are behind the table, and behind me is another table, with my stuff on it. But this too is in the middle of this great hall, which is like a fair.
Bale might be somewhere in this dream.
5. Present from a Girl
Last dream and after having been awake first, so maybe hypnagogic.
Brva and Digr are very busy with books and preparing for a great sale. This is in a great hall with long tables set like in an auditorium for students, and I am sure the sale is for student books. I help them out, at one table in particular. I sit in the middle of it, and books are stacked on top of it. Again tree titles. And they are sure they will sell all of it. I'm sure it is counted.
It is afternoon, but no customers come, and we wait. When my work is done, I am waiting too, and a long time I don't do anything. Brva and Digr are always busy, but now they too realize they will have to wait. They even have news for me, because they tell me that students will only come from 4pm onwards.
Can't remember what happens next, but by the end of the dream I am at another table, the first one when you enter, and many young people sit at it, and more and more, and at last someone says that they, which is we of the shop, have counted well, since there are exactly so many chairs, and I am thinking I don't belong here, and I don't know how to go away without anyone noticing, but I should go back to my own table, which is my station, where I was asked to be, but before everyone entered it did not matter. Now everyone is here and still arriving, I should go back to my post.
Later, possibly the same dream, I am in another house, in the back, standing, with a few others, at a table, they sit, me standing at a high table. We discuss something. At some point someone who delivers packages comes in and gives me a package, he says it is from a certain person named Falter something, and I know this girl, and by the comment the delivery boy gives, the others also know it is a girl, and that she might have some interest in me, though I believe she is just being attentive, but they all smile and giggle. I let it go, happy enough to get post from someone. I feel good about it. Three books I think, at least books. But the attentive thing is that she knew I asked about these in particular, and I think it might have something to do with the work I was doing earlier, that is why I don't see too much in it.
Market, half inside, such as Borough Market in London, but one long stretch. I am part of the crew, yet not of any stall in particular, and am on the customer side. I see a transaction between a woman seller and a young man coming to buy something. The woman recommends her wares, in this case fresh lettuce with goat's cheese on top, and I think it looks really good and fresh, and am already thinking I should have this myself when I wake up. He is not easily persuaded, but she serves nothing else to him, so he accepts eventually, smiling all the way. They are both very kind to each other and the transaction is amiable, I like that. He makes some comment as to the truth of her words when she packs the lettuce with goat cheese on it here and there.
There were also all kinds of carrots, and the woman intended to prepare them for a salad, I am now at her side and am of a mind to help her. My own thoughts go to adding radishes, but she does not have them, though thinking about them creates them. She has a purple kind of carrot in particular which she wants to add, and I am curious because I know it is delicious, and at the same time I don't know the root, and want to see her prepare it, but I never see it. Other ingredients were there, all on the wooden tables where her wares are.
2. Skunk Anansi
In the shop, Tama is working and I join her, at the till, there is a long queue, and we are the only two present in the shop, so it comes down to us. At first I was not at the till but in the back, now I walk to the counter, and pass through all the folk crowded, and the shop is long and small, and people are packed. And I think one or two people came to get me out and walk me to the till, so I go with them, but when I see on my right halfway through the shop Skunk Anansi playing I stop a little and wave. I knew she would be playing, but still the sight of her surprised be, and I thought it good that she entertained people, this is a success, to have someone like that in the shop. But for now I have to go to the till and help out Tama.
There are only three titles and soon enough all the copies are gone, though they were here in great quantities, but the books are popular and everyone wants one.
At some point I am having trouble with the change in the till, because we ran out of notes of five and maybe other things, and after a while I announce to Tama that I should go and fetch some change from the float. I know she will find it difficult, and I have to leave her alone for a while, since there is no one else, but I have to do this, so I go, and in the back, which looks like the Oxfam shop where I worked once, from the safe I take some change, and I even say the word 'float' when someone asks from behind the purple curtain that separates this dark chamber from the shop, but this is someone I can trust, I know her.
3. The Giant
Other fragment. Again a long space, dark now. I am on the left. We all sit. I am not all the way on the left, and other people are with me, but my brother D is on the right, which is another group. And I have work to do with DVD's, and the people with me join me. And there is one dvd, which is called The Giant, with a black cover, that I know is a bit special, but after I've handled it I put it aside, which is all the way to the left, as if abandoned, and this I do without leaving my chair somehow.
But D knows about this dvd, and warns me, and at that point already I had seen the black stuff coming from the corner where I put the dvd. The stuff reminded me of the Shrike, a character from an sf novel, so the stuff is some technology and something alive as well, it is like an arm, maybe a sort of metal, I can't describe it well, maybe if you make a long stick from lego bricks that would come near it. But there are many such arms, tendrils, but not flexible, but strong, like robotic, and composite all of them, and black, and one of these is longer than the others and comes toward me and I fear it, but it never reaches me exactly, but D warns me and says I should be careful, and I know I should go away, but I don't want to, but the thing never touches me. There must have been some intelligence or will in it.
4. Celery and Ruby
Open space inside, selling going on, haggling also. This is like a fair, and again I am part of the crew, but not an active one, not selling myself, but helping out and I know about the goods. The first thing sold I can't remember, but there was another family waiting at the same time, who had already chosen what they wanted to buy, and I see it lying on the floor. They want celery, but it is as large and big as branches from a big tree, longer than a man, really gigantic. They can't carry it because it is so big, which is why it is on the floor.
Finally the seller has time to attend to them, and he goes into detail, and they are happy, especially the wife. And he goes so far as to say he can tell the future or fortune by these celery sticks. And he counts the years by tens that she will have to live, but I see that the count will not work out when I follow his tallying, and it is so, because at the end he starts to say seventy, eighty, ninety, and the last part of this celery is more like leek in fact, but I see how he counts it, no secret for me. And I also realize that when he would have counted right, he would end by an age of seventy. But now he himself is confused. He does not care and continues and says he can see how many children they will have, namely four, because of the knots where the celery forks, and I nod when I see it. But if I remember well, they had two kids already, yet they are happy with the prospect.
Then or maybe before, the seller asks my help again with other customers, again a family, the wife comes to collect something she ordered, has questions, out of curiosity, and the seller helps her well, and orders me around for this or that, but I know what it is about so it is okay.
I am wearing my ruby on a string here, and this family is the family Robijns, which means ruby, and the woman comes for a ruby, she has one herself, which had to be repaired or something, but the seller shows him other goods, and she is choosing. The seller says about the ruby she is wearing that she should have it cut. I see all those stones, there are others beside ruby. She bends over it to have a good look. We are behind the table, and behind me is another table, with my stuff on it. But this too is in the middle of this great hall, which is like a fair.
Bale might be somewhere in this dream.
5. Present from a Girl
Last dream and after having been awake first, so maybe hypnagogic.
Brva and Digr are very busy with books and preparing for a great sale. This is in a great hall with long tables set like in an auditorium for students, and I am sure the sale is for student books. I help them out, at one table in particular. I sit in the middle of it, and books are stacked on top of it. Again tree titles. And they are sure they will sell all of it. I'm sure it is counted.
It is afternoon, but no customers come, and we wait. When my work is done, I am waiting too, and a long time I don't do anything. Brva and Digr are always busy, but now they too realize they will have to wait. They even have news for me, because they tell me that students will only come from 4pm onwards.
Can't remember what happens next, but by the end of the dream I am at another table, the first one when you enter, and many young people sit at it, and more and more, and at last someone says that they, which is we of the shop, have counted well, since there are exactly so many chairs, and I am thinking I don't belong here, and I don't know how to go away without anyone noticing, but I should go back to my own table, which is my station, where I was asked to be, but before everyone entered it did not matter. Now everyone is here and still arriving, I should go back to my post.
Later, possibly the same dream, I am in another house, in the back, standing, with a few others, at a table, they sit, me standing at a high table. We discuss something. At some point someone who delivers packages comes in and gives me a package, he says it is from a certain person named Falter something, and I know this girl, and by the comment the delivery boy gives, the others also know it is a girl, and that she might have some interest in me, though I believe she is just being attentive, but they all smile and giggle. I let it go, happy enough to get post from someone. I feel good about it. Three books I think, at least books. But the attentive thing is that she knew I asked about these in particular, and I think it might have something to do with the work I was doing earlier, that is why I don't see too much in it.
Wednesday, 9 October 2013
Anger is a Problem
1. Stay up Late
Staying up late, till 12 o'clock. First I was in a group. Earlier been eating with others, not really a restaurant but eating out somewhere. Pebr and Rume are there. Pebr is angry, mad. Drop something, about music, maybe eating the music? Pebr angry is a problem.
Music of Lacrimosa at the end, but the whole time more or less like that.
Midnight, Niru comes home. Before we were in group as I said, behind the houses, in a field where different patches of field and lined with trees touch and give access to other gardens but it is the backside, so away from the public. Can't remember rightly why all this was organised. Certainly a girl in the group, might be the leader. Me I stay behind when they leave on their quest, I am not involved in this, yet somehow I am a part, but I rather go home or stay home, which is back down the small path to where the house is. They do some game I think. Ladies.
When Niru comes home, this is inside, and on the sofa I am?
Staying up late, till 12 o'clock. First I was in a group. Earlier been eating with others, not really a restaurant but eating out somewhere. Pebr and Rume are there. Pebr is angry, mad. Drop something, about music, maybe eating the music? Pebr angry is a problem.
Music of Lacrimosa at the end, but the whole time more or less like that.
Midnight, Niru comes home. Before we were in group as I said, behind the houses, in a field where different patches of field and lined with trees touch and give access to other gardens but it is the backside, so away from the public. Can't remember rightly why all this was organised. Certainly a girl in the group, might be the leader. Me I stay behind when they leave on their quest, I am not involved in this, yet somehow I am a part, but I rather go home or stay home, which is back down the small path to where the house is. They do some game I think. Ladies.
When Niru comes home, this is inside, and on the sofa I am?
Tuesday, 8 October 2013
Chninkel
1. Wet Dream
I remember having a wet dream, felt it coming, had not enough vitality to keep it back, so it was long and soft, which is okay. The dream itself I don't remember, but there was light and the colours were of a good quality. Yellow things and blue things.
2. Old Comic Book
Daddy gives comic books to us, to me in particular but it is meant of my brothers and me. I am in charge. But I see from afar that nothing remarkable is among the comics. I don't really want to take it.
After a while, one stands out, because there must be at least one, and this is one I know already, but have read only once and some years ago already, about the Chninkel. I don't think it is a very good one, but better this than nothing. There are others, such as Jommeke, and a list of RPG things, but nothing with a story (?). Kitchen.
I also have to take care of dinner, but there is nothing in the house, nothing in stock. N will go out. So I stay behind alone.
I remember having a wet dream, felt it coming, had not enough vitality to keep it back, so it was long and soft, which is okay. The dream itself I don't remember, but there was light and the colours were of a good quality. Yellow things and blue things.
2. Old Comic Book
Daddy gives comic books to us, to me in particular but it is meant of my brothers and me. I am in charge. But I see from afar that nothing remarkable is among the comics. I don't really want to take it.
After a while, one stands out, because there must be at least one, and this is one I know already, but have read only once and some years ago already, about the Chninkel. I don't think it is a very good one, but better this than nothing. There are others, such as Jommeke, and a list of RPG things, but nothing with a story (?). Kitchen.
I also have to take care of dinner, but there is nothing in the house, nothing in stock. N will go out. So I stay behind alone.
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